A Beeded Breast

Día de Muertos, Fruitvale, Oakland, California USA; Takasphoto.com

December 28, 2018

I know I say this all the time but last’s night’s dream was very cool.  I am in a stadium.  Apparently I live here.  I am trying to decide where to put my office to make room for the baby.  The stadium is so expansive I want the layout to make sense.  It is recommended to me that I set my office on the stage as then it would be sectioned off for this specific purpose.  I believe it to be a good idea.  I am waiting for people to arrive.  It seems the business we conduct is growing and we therefore can benefit from the added space the stadium provides.  We still have use of some old freight containers where we used to conduct our business.  These containers can be put to other use.  There is a guy here dressed like a flamboyant gypsy.  He is very handsome.   I can see his pants ballooning as he walks.  He seems to be the one providing interior design ideas.  He shows me how he has repurposed the shipping containers.  As I walk through to look at the new layout a man catches me eye.  We look at each other.  There is an immediate intense attraction but I am somewhat distracted by the gypsy and his show and tell.

An opportunity arises for me to visit privately with the man as the gypsy walks off ahead of us.  The man comes over and I immediately offer him a hug.  As he goes to hug me his shirt opens up revealing his chest.  His chest has many beads with an emblem in the center of his heart.  The beads seem to be something I identify with.  I am so happy to see him.  I pull him in close to me. As I reach around to his back with my bear hug my hands feel beeds that hang on his back also.  The beeds offer me an ever greater assurance he is the one I’ve been searching for.

The warmth from our bodies creates ashes that float away in the wind.  When I first notice the ashes they look like bats because the seem to be flying in the air but as I look at them more closely I realize they are not bats but the ashes from the sage I have been burning in my offerings.   The ashes are going everywhere.    I worry they will be upset with me for the mess I am making with the ashes.  I want to continue hugging the man but the hugs are creating more ashes.  I hug him for just a little bit longer giving him one lasting hug.  I look again at the ashes to see what I might need to do to clean up but now I notice the ashes are turning into babies.  Hundreds of babies.  Each ash flake developing into a baby.  Oh no, what I am going to do with so many children.

 

~~~~ DREAM ENDS

I found this image on the internet.  I was thinking where can I possibly find an image of a man with a ton of beeds on his chest.  This one seems so perfect as it has the man wearing an emblem on his chest.  I assume the beeds probably hang down on his back.  He holds the same look the guy did in my dream.  A look of wanting or yearning.  A look that calls you close.

I like that much like the ashes relate to a ritual, the indigenous man probably also has rituals he engages in.

 

This image was used for editorial purpose only.

Shattering of the Universe; How Magick Happens

December 26, 2018

Last night’s dream was very cool.  I was watching Harry Potter before going to bed and I wondered if there was a train platform numbered 9 3/4 in my dream where magick happens and if my dreams have a school of Hogwarts for teaching magick.  I fell asleep with the thought.

In the dream, I find myself at work.  I am friendly with the guy who is the parking attendant for my building.  His company owns several businesses including several parking lots.  Since his workers don’t make a lot of money, he offers them investment tips.  On this day, I over hear him giving out some tips in the way of business news.  I then go about my business.

At work one of my coworkers is Marcus who is a very heavy set black guy who reminds me of the Marcus from MKP.  He is also gay as is Marcus from MKP.  In talking to Marcus, I notice his beautiful qualities and his inner potential.  Even though he is over weight, I help him see a bright future for himself.  In talking to him, something he tells me rings true with the conversation I overheard early regarding the business news.  Today’s news I believe Marcus can apply directly to his life.  Marcus is very excited and begins believing in himself.  He is loosing weight and is wearing a beautiful blue dress.  His hair is long and his makeup is done up nicely.  He likes dressing to accentuate his feminine side.

The next morning, I tell Marcus to meet me at the parking lot where I can introduce him to the parking lot attendant.  We are waiting just outside the parking booth for the attendant to arrive with today’s business news.  After he offers the news to his employees, I get his attention and introduce Marcus.  I stutter in explaining how he can possibly help Marcus.  My inner dialog doesn’t want to seem as if I am asking for his help under an Affirmative Action because he is black.  I want him to know I believe in Marcus and I think he can benefit greatly from his assistance.  As if to read my mind, the parking attendant tells me not to worry, he will help Marcus as I’ve indicated.  Excited with his approval I look at Marcus who now looks stunning.  I pause for a moment to see how Marcus has changed.  I think to myself, “I could really love someone as beautiful as Marcus.”

We walk together back to our office.  Marcus is very excited on his new prospects for the future.  I am happy to have been able to help him in this way.  A truck is driving out of the parking lot and down a road where there is construction.  He drives over a pot hole.  I yell don’t do it you won’t survive the fall.  His car splits in two and is swallowed up by the river that runs along side the road.  I tell Marcus he will have to pluck his car out of the river now.  Marcus and I continue walking.  As we walk, Marcus comes up with a way to apply this new knowledge to help the man recover his truck.  He is eager to help someone.  He comes up with a way to create a sonic boom.  The boom will fragment the Universe shattering it to pieces just enough for the man to recover his truck from the river.  The shattering of the Universe allows us to easily rearrange the pieces of the truck.

The idea works as the boom sounds.  The Universe now looks like a mosaic.  Through the cracks a worm hole appears and a beautiful lavender light comes rushing in.  I see and understand how magick happens.  I realize it is Marcus who helps me.

Call of the Green Man

December 24, 2018

Last night’s dream was quite amazing.  As I was falling asleep for the night I had a vision where I am with a young man embarking on a journey.  A man calls out to us from a distance.  As if calling me into the dream.  I’m unaware I am dreaming because I’m still awake and was about to get up to turn off the lights but at that moment am completely pulled into the experience.  I gesture over to the young man standing beside me asking, “Who is this man who calls from a distance?”  His voice is very familiar to me.  I focus on his face and like a mirage it begins to fade in and out.  The first awareness comes to me, I am visioning.  I’m still curious who the man is who calls from a distance.  In this moment, I am unable to discern who is real and who is part of the vision.  The man next to me feels very real.  He is so much a part of me I don’t even question who he is.  When in reality both are dream figures but it just doesn’t occur to me to ask who is the man standing next to me.  I struggle to get a good look at the distant man’s face.

Cleo my cat jumps on the bed and awakens me.  I get up, pet her and turn off the lights.

I lay my head back down and immediately return to the dream this time I am sitting in a charcoal colored pickup truck on the passengers side.  The driver is the ferry man from earlier.  He reaches over and hands me a key ring with about 7 USB thumb drives.  I ask if he can identify the one we were watching earlier, the one he was just now showing me?  He is too busy to pay attention to me focusing instead on pulling strings to ferry us to the other side.  He dismisses me and say’s, “You’ll find it.”

I am now in a Colosseum where hundreds of people are gathered for an event.  With this many people it is hard to control who enters and is present.  I seem to be the head master or person at the top of the ticket but I don’t have full control on what happens at the periphery.  It reminds me of a scene from Harry Potter.  Magic is happening everywhere.  Everyone knows magic here.  Wanting to verify my audience and test whether my minions are in harmony with my ask, I send out a signal which in essence forces all those present to identify themselves.  The responses come back.  There are a few responses I am not happy with.  A second call goes out to try to harmonize correctly.  It is very much like tuning an orchestra.  They must be in tune with my vibration for us to proceed.  I am still not satisfied with the response.  I hear something in a side room the kitchen.  I walk over to the kitchen but don’t see anyone there yet I can here the clatter of dishes. It spooks me for a moment but I am determined to draw us in harmony.  I walk around the kitchen attempting to come closer and closer to where the sound originates.  I end up following the sound unto a brick oven with a chimney.  The brick all around is crimson red.  I wonder if I am going to get buried alive in here.  I try to fly from this position but am unable to reach any heights.   I sink deeper and deeper into the oven as the brick closes in on me.  I refuse to be overtaken.  I send out yet another signal which causes an etheric clearing to open in the walls of the oven.  A swarm of dragon flies enter.  They are of every color of the rainbow.  They dance as they fly creating beautiful shapes and images of all sizes.  The fluttering of their wings create a vibration. The vibration shakes loose the walls and all the surroundings.  It is our frequency which harmonizes dissonance.  I look up and float through an opening in the top of the oven.

I am now back in the Colosseum.  People gather here.  I see many wear green paint.  I assume the green man is among us.  There are many other nature spirits present.  There is one man with an incredibly full beard.  Someone is giving him a shower to hose off some of the green from his thick curly beard.

~~~~~ DREAM ENDS

Thoughts in journaling:  At first, I didn’t know whether to record the visioning part of the dream which came early before I actually fell asleep.  I initially didn’t connect the Ferryman with the other part of the dream that followed until i heard the question I ask him regarding the USB drives.  I wanted to see the one he was showing me earlier.  It is at this point when he is busy pulling strings to “ferry” (Faerie) us over to the other side.  Interesting play on words here.  It wasn’t until the I thought the green man was present since everyone had green paint on that I understood the use of ferry.  A green man is a faerie.  So I think he was the green man.

The USB’s were also interesting.  I thought what could possibly be on them? It wasn’t until later that I recalled watching YouTube videos of 8 week sonograms of pregnant women and noticed the doctors often hand out USB thumb drives with the sonogram images for the parents to keep.  I think this equates places it in an OB  category.

Other observation was my time in the oven.  The oven bricks were red and the space felt closed in.  I wonder if is a reference to a uterus.  Could this be a reference to OB?  Are faeries responsible for delivering children?

 

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The Cosmic Egg


December 3rd, 2018

Last night’s dream was absolutely incredible.  My body is being elevated.  I am ascending in the universe at an incredible speed.  I can see the stars all around me.  I come to a point in space where a picture frame hangs in front of me.  I am positioned at a 45 degree angle to the frame.  The frame is metallic and in the center is a white egg shape symbol.  The frame is reflective much like a mirror.

Out of the blue I decide to hold my right palm in front of the image much like swearing an oath to the object but my intention is to offer the object a blessing by sending it healing energy.  The egg begins radiating an intense light.  I am amazed at how beautiful the light appears in the heavens.

The light causes an elevator door to appear to the right of the frame.  I notice many beings approaching from the left.  I turn to look at the beings now congregating around the frame, immediately to my left.  Taking a good look at them I can see they are shadows of angels because they all have wings.

The elevator door opens and a man appears in the elevator.  The man has dark olive skin and wears a big head dress.  His face looks larger than a typical human might look but yet he has human features.  I wonder if he might be an alien or a heavenly being.  I wonder if this is some kind of space ship.  Why would he need an elevator?  Not wanting the man to see me I take two steps back to blend in and hide among the angles present.  Feeling as though I’m not quite camouflaged sufficiently behind the angels I take two steps to my right.  This last move places me more in line of sight with the being in the elevator.  I turn to slightly giving him my profile.  I can still see his profile out of the corner of my eye.  The man’s features are striking and I wonder if I am the man.  I ponder the coincidence he too offers me his profile.

All of the sudden my consciousness begins to fly at an incredible speed ascending even higher traversing many levels of the stratosphere.  I turn to look behind me to see what happened to the angels who were standing with me.  They appear to be following in flight right behind me.  I attempt to understand what is going on and wonder if I am trying to flee or if they are simply following me.  I turn again to wave at the angels behind me.  The wave causes a few of the angels to dissipate but they are quickly replaced by more angels.

I then find myself in a cargo bay with all the angels we are sitting around after a long flight.  It feels like we are getting comfortable maybe taking off our shoes or flight gear and getting dressed into our normal day cloths.  As I look around I can see their faces clearly and I think to myself, I need to remember all this because it is so incredible.  Someone looks at me as if reading my mind and gives me a peace sign with two fingers.  He is indicating there are two types of dreams, one which I’m familiar with and the other ….. he goes silent here even though he is not really saying anything but yet he is communicating with me.  The second type are those you feel but instead of messaging me telepathically he sends me his feelings.

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A Blade of Rainbow Families – The Day My Mother Died

September 21, 2018

In last night’s dream, I am with a group of people at possibly a book store or news stand type store where they sell magazines, periodicals and novelties.  I don’t believe I know the people in the store as it seems we are all just passing through and by circumstance we all happen to meet here.  There is a large box on the floor where they have placed all the out of date items.  I see several copies of the Washington Blade.  Believing these are probably throw-away items and therefore free I walk over to look for the most recent edition.  The first edition I pick up and open it to the cover page but it no longer has the first page.  A guy dressed in all yellow says to me as if he is aware of my thoughts, “That’s not the latest edition.”  So I put the copy down and reach for another one which I identify as having all it’s pages.

The second one is complete and is the latest edition of the throw-away items in the box.  I proceed to open the pages and notice all the pages are cut revealing an accordion of cut out characters emerging from the pages.  I close it quickly not knowing what is happening to it and try again to open it.  This time I open it slowly to see what the cut out are.  As the pages unfold the cut out characters become two dimensional animated cut out of people.  All the cut outs are white cream color with no writing or features merely cut outs.  The guy next to me who is all yellow reaches in and pulls out a spinet piano from the pages of the blade.  I am amazed because I recognize the piano as the one I had when I was a kid.  The yellow man begins playing testing the keys and notices a problem.  It is suspected there is a ball of poop in the pages so he is wanting to work around the poop to reconstruct his piano.

With the magazine in my hands I can feel a lump withing the pages still in my left hand.  I hold the “poop” tightly and walk over to examine the piano.  I lift the lid of the piano to reveal it’s keys and find one of the strings is broken.  I tell the yellow man that the piano is so old one would expect a string to be broken but it can be easily repaired.  While I’m talking to him still holding the “poop ball” within my hand it begins to squirm in my hand.  I let go releasing the tightly held pages and opening the remaining pages of the magazine open.  From within the ball emerge a bunch of tiny etheric people 10 times smaller than the cut outs previously.  Each one a different color of the rainbow.  There are blues, yellows, reds, purple, green.  They remind me of little pieces of Play Doh.  Now reconstituted they are jumping and playing with each other.  When groups of different colors come together they become white and grey and beige then separating again into their individual color.  Rainbow colors pulse through their tiny etheric bodies.

Doors Open

September 7, 2018

Last night I had a dream where I am visiting my mom.  She lives in a luxury high rise building.  Only the exterior of the building is luxurious because people in this place don’t spend much time inside their apartments.  They spend most of the time on their balconies and in the shared living spaces on the exterior of the building.  Visitors are allowed to freely visit the balconies and shared spaces adjacent the private units.  I am taking in the breathtaking view of the skyline.  There is a jogging track that corkscrews around the outside the building.  I am afraid of heights so I decide to stay near the pool.  There are many small pools scattered around the perimeter of the building so that each resident does not have to walk far to find a pool or vista to enjoy.  I walk around and visit several of the units.  The view outside each unit is spectacular.  There is one building in the distance which i recognize.  It is slightly hidden behind dense fog it is the World Trade Center.  I ask the person I’m with,  “Isn’t that the World Trade Center?”  The person with me answers,  “Why YES!” in disbelief not that it it the World Trade Center because the World Trade Center is gone but that I have the ability to see it.

I turn inward to visit with my mom in her unit.  She is counting coins which she has collected during her stay.  Apparently they have a casino in the building.  She tells me she doesn’t know how to play but every time she passes a table she places a coin down and walks away.  The casino has now tracked her down to bring her her winnings.  She has so many coins of all types of denominations including large coins of a very high value.  She is rich and doesn’t know it because she doesn’t understand the value of the coins.

My mom is in a wheelchair and I decide to sit with her and take in one of the views.  I notice the unit she is in is empty with absolutely no furnishings.  Again, people don’t spend much time in their quarters.  I notice the door handle to her unit is handicap accessible in that the door knob is a leaver and is positioned low to the ground.  The door knob keeps falling off when I try to use it.  I tell my mom, “I’m going to have to tell the maintenance man to fix it.”  My mom then says to me, “Why do you need to close the door?”

 

Rebuilding Love Lost Hospital

September 5, 2018

In last night’s dream I find myself standing outside an old abandoned building.  There is a man who stands with me.  He is the lone survivor and now is working to restore the building.  He tells me the story of the building.  He says it was a hospital at one time where many people were healed.  I can tell the building suffered a fire.   I ask him what happened to the patients in the building at the time of the fire.  He tells me the fire killed everyone except him.  I ask him if the building is now haunted.  He says it definitely is haunted.  The spirits of the dead still live here.  I ask is he is not afraid to work here to which he answers NO someone has to do the work.  I offer to help him.  I am with my dog Butters.  He then gives me a tour of the building to see what people were doing right before the fire.  I can see a couple making out in their car in the parking lot. There is a little boy who comes toward me and starts walking at my side.  I assume he wants to come along for the tour.  I place my palm on his head to let him know he is welcome on the tour.  I notice the moment my palm touches his hair on his head a wave of energy flows through me.  This energy lifts us both up off our feet.   I immediately have the ability of flight.  We float together to the higher floors of the hospital.

I am now lucid.  Knowing I have powers in the dream, I take a good look around me, at my surroundings to try to understand the mechanics of the dream and the correlation between the dream and my waking life.  I can see the fabric of the the dream vibrating with rainbow colors in which the dream constructs the scenes.  I think to myself this must be my aura or spirit as it’s light extends beyond my dream body.  I look around for Butters and discover he is now a young man.  I think his child name might need to be changed to reflect his new manhood.

The Table Congregation

August 29, 2018

Last night I had a bizarre dream.  I find myself in what appears to be a  stairwell of a building possibly leading to a mechanical area.  The way the stairwell is structured it is very complex.  It reminds me of the skeleton of Arc de Triomphe.  I am chasing an entity.  It is elusive.  It is a part of me that hides itself from me.  It passes in flashes of light.  This is an internal struggle where I alone can reconcile with this force within me.  I must find the flash of light and confront it, unite with it and harness it.  I must tame the beast.  I can see it zipping past me in the corners of my vision.

I decide on a strategy.  I scale the stairs to the top where there is a meeting hall with two separate, distinct and rectangular tables in the center.  People come here to resolve issues.  As the attendants walk in they take their seats.   There are two balcony rows above the area where the tables are where spectators can come and gather to view the discussions.  I sit at one of the tables and wait for everyone else to sit at either of the available tables.  I observe who is on which side.  Nancy Polossi walks in and sits at the opposing table.  I am thrilled to see her but she does not say hello.  She appears unfriendly and cold.  This angers me as I notice people here are not in good spirits with one another.  Since I am in charge of this space and this meeting that I’ve convened, I ask them to all stand and file themselves by their respective ages.  Not wanting to come together all the participants scatter to the balconies.  They don’t seem to want to follow instructions.  I  tell them they must accept the the terms or they cannot rejoin the table.  I give them instructions on how to pair up one junior member and one senior member.  The senior members must tutor the junior members and the junior members must assist with the responsibilities of the senior members.  The senior members must learn to be like junior members in there curiosity and innocence for life.  Every week when we gather going forward we will conduct this exercise and in time we will learn to work together.  Still reluctant and dismissive of my demands.  I sit back down in the center. The two tables are now one large circular table.   As I sit the table becomes a pure white being.  I begin talking with The Table Entity.  We are as old friends so happy to be reunited.  I decide to take a picture of us to send it to the members.  The members are now calling me on the phone wanting to join the congregation.  I can see them in the balconies having done a 180 in their attitude.  They in return show me their painted faces and celebration outfits.  Everyone is dressed up beautifully like the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence.

~~~~~ DREAM ENDS

Curiously as I was journalling the dream not knowing where it was going or how it would unfold one of the things that struck me was the focal point of The Table(s).  I attend a church called the Table Church.  I really liked the way it became an entity unto itself.   I assume this entity is what I was seeking to find and reconcile with.  I also thought it humorous that those things that keep the table separate and in conflict turned out to the the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgences.  I also love the ending where we could come together and poke fun at ourselves be happy festive and reunited as one Table Entity.  Is this the way God would want it?  I think so.

A Return To The Hall Of Records

August 24, 2018

In last night’s dream I find myself in the Hall of Records.  This place is where people come to learn about events.  It’s a happy place much like an amusement part. People are eating, socializing and celebrating.  People take joy in knowing truth.  I’m a bit intimidated because there is so much here and I know I may stumble on information that is privileged or under seal.  I initially walk through just to take note of what all is available for review.  There are various rooms with different themes.  You can learn a lot just by being aware of the items and the names of the articles.  Once at the end I ask if I can return for  a closer look at some of the items I found of particular interest to me.  I would really like to sit in silence and take in the information.  Too learn more about the generations who came before me.

People are now gathering with me.  Although they didn’t come with me I feel they are here to surreptitiously know more about me.  There is also a sense of celebration.   They seem to not be forthcoming with information but instead wanting me to discover my truth.   My confidence increasing and my shyness diminishing.  I feel welcome to gather here with them.  I don’t want to leave.

I notice a wet spot on the floor.  Oh no Butters pee’d.  I instantly wake up needing to pee.  Happy to Butters didn’t actually pee.  I rush to the bathroom to do my business and returned to bed.

Castle Lights

Bamburgh Castle at night

August 10, 2018

Last night I had a dream where I find myself in a huge castle.  I’ve been here before.  I seem to be very familiar with the layout and where things are and how they work.  I am well known for the inner workings of the castle.  The castle is so big it has small streets within it.  There are a set of inner lights that are not often used.  I think it is a good occasion to turn them on but I need to replace one of the light bulbs for it to work.  The electrical system has two sources one comes from the castle itself and the other comes from the city in which the castle sits.  This set of lights because they serve the roads within the castle are served by the city.  I find the junction boxes.  My sister Grace is with me.  I tell her to be cautious because we would need to turn off the city power first to tamper with the junction box.  I also tell her that she can’t use just any light bulb to replace the one that is burned out it must be a special light bulb which is similar to the ones used in the tail lights of cars with the small prongs on them.  She is impatient and feels she knows it all.  I decide to use an old light bulb and not a new one just in case if it blows out.  I vaguely remember what happened last time I tried to change the light bulb.  As if to go back in time to the point where the light bulb blew out I insert the light bulb.  For about 3 minutes the lights in the inner city turn on.  The streets within the castle look simply beautiful.  I had forgotten how beautiful and magical the city looks when the lights are on.   One of the wall torches begins to flicker signalling a possible short in the wiring.  We need to access the problem area by going down in a manhole under the castle grounds. I take my dog which is an unusual looking white dog.  He is very nice but a bit too adventurous.  This work requires caution.  I’m afraid the dog will fall in the manhole and I’ll have trouble getting him out.  The dog looks in the manhole and I guess doesn’t find it interesting or it doesn’t grab his attentions and Instead he goes off running toward the corner sniffing the buildings.  I cautiously do what I need to do to fix the problem in the manhole.

Later in the dream I run into Joe my ex.  He tells me he has the money he owes me.  I hardly believe it true since Joe is all about lies and procrastination.  Why would he of his own volition want to repay a debt to me?  He then shows me the calculations he has made.  They are not numbers in the sense that we would know them but instead an arrangement of artifacts.  The placement of things seems to tell a story.  I ponder the items and the story they tell.  Just as I am about to wake from the dream the thought enters my head…Aha! the baby.  It add up to a baby.