Look At Me Bobby

June 6th, 2018

I had a dream where my mom has a museum where she displays artifacts from history.  The artifacts have religious or spiritual connotations.  Things like tuning bowls, instruments, mandalas etc.  My mom lives in the house behind the museum.  Someone comes into the museum looking for her wanting to borrow my bike. The person is a cousin possibly Victor.  I’m thinking I hope my mom hasn’t started lending out my things to people because these things are things I cherish and have great value and memories tied to them.  I don’t seem to remember how to get to her house.  He tells me they need access to the water lines.  As he is leaving, I tell him,  I am the son of Otilia.  I then discretely follow behind him knowing if I follow him he will lead me to where my mom is or lives.  I may learn more about my mom.  Behind the house is a natural body of water which is very deep.  The water glows orange and yellow in the light of the sun.  He now has lion hair and a furr coat on.  He now reminds me of my cousin Jeannette.  She dives in to retrieve what they need to access the water main.  When she comes out at the other end I tell her she didn’t have to jump in the water with her coat on.  She then takes the coat off to dry it and now she is a man with a beautiful hairy chest.  I think to myself, why would you cover that up his beautiful furry chest with a furr coat?  He rushes off to get his firetruck.  I am looking in the direction where he went waiting to see him return when from behind a truck and trailer approach.  The truck has no sides or top.  I ask him if it is legal to drive around like that.  He gets off the truck and tells me this is his firetruck.

Scenes flash before me like short 3 second movie clips.  Messages from these people come rushing in.  In one clip, I see my son when he is young.  I stop the clip because after all its my dream and I want to see my son.  The dream pauses for just a moment long enough for me to get a good look.

(Click on above image it’s a 3 second clip)

In the time span of a breath I take in his image.  Feeling complete I exhale allowing the dream to continue.  I then see a man who looks at me.  I am still coming off the intense high of seeing my son so I am not paying much attention to anything else.  I feel like I have what I came for.  Again he makes a facial gesture indicating he too has a message for me.  I am still unable to focus.  He looks directly into my eyes and says,  “Look at me.”  I pause long enough for me to get a good look at this man.  The dream ends here as his image slowly fades from my mind.  Who is this man?

~~~~ DREAM ENDS HERE

I then woke up and recorded the details of the dream.  After my coffee I wanted to know who this man was.  Why was it so important for me to look into his eyes.  I said a prayer and walked into my library glancing slowly at the pictures on the shelves.  I wanted to find a picture with someone I can look into their eyes.  I then came to my Grandmothers photograph.  I stared at my Grandma for a few minutes and felt complete.

I then went upstairs to start my day.  The man’s face a man I’ve never seen before yet clear as day in my mind’s eye sat there not wanting to leave me.  I turned on the TV to watch MSNBC.  The news was having a segment honoring Robert F Kennedy.  It was a long segment on his life.  I am slightly annoyed because I want the regular news.  What is going on with Bobby Kennedy today that they are taking so much time recounting his life.  They then turned to a picture of him and OMG it was his face in my dream.  It was his face exactly.

I then went online to look for pictures of him to possibly look into his eyes.  Come to find out today it is the 50th anniversary of his death.  He died 50 years ago at Good Samaritan Hospital in Los Angeles.

My grandmother Simona Camargo also died at Good Samaritan Hospital when I was in the 8th grade probably 1978.  This is the picture I have of my Grandmother in my library.  I worked at Good Samaritan as a candy stripper the summer she died.  My aunt Helen also worked there as a nurse.  I thought it unusual when I came to her picture how perfect it felt to looking into her eyes.  I felt it must have been her.  I thought maybe my grandma came to me as a man in my dream but why would she do that?  Apparently there was so much more to be told.  What is the coincidence that today would be the anniversary of Bobby’s death.  Curious too the image I found online of bobby near the body of water is a 3 second clip much like the clips presented to me in the dream.  Had he possibly been swimming there in that picture?  And apparently he has a hairy chest.  So many coincidences.

I know beyond a shadow of a doubt it was OB I saw before this man showed his face.  Was it then OB all along showing me his firetruck?  I like the picture of Bobby and the little girl.  I imaging myself someday with OB.  I wonder is that was his daughter.  I don’t know much about Bobby Kennedy.  Was OB my Grandma and Bobby all in heaven conspiring to send me messages.  I think so. I am a blessed man to have a direct connection to the higher realms.

May you rest in Peace Bobby.  And to my Grandma I remember you like it was yesterday.  I will never forget you.  Le tengo mucho amor abuelita.

 

Sasha’s Pocket Pastries

 

May 27, 2018

I am the co-producer of a movie actually more like the technical director of the movie.  Hillary Clinton is in the movie playing one of the parts.  She has to travel from Los Angeles to DC.  When I see her I know she had to travel all that distance to get here and is apparently in good shape.  She is refreshed and ready to go.  She is not one for detail so I have to explain the technicalities to her such that she is able to carry out only her actions.  For her to remember more is simply ineffective.  Plus I don’t want to tell her too much about the movie because there are a lot of sex scenes so it is best to just tell her the technical details of her scenes.

I am now on a coffee break with my friend Sasha, she is here on a short term assignment.  I am looking through the pastry cart at the offerings available.  The coffee smells delicious.  There are so many pastries to choose from.  I spot a double decker pastry I like.  I reach for the dish with one hand while pouring my coffee with the other.  At the same time, I’m chatting with Sasha.  Distracted I look down at my pastry and realize it has changed.  I am frustrated because I want the other one I chose.  I internalize a thought that says to me,  “I should have known the dream would change the scene on me,  (apparently I am aware I am in a dream).”  I slap the pastry dish down on the counter to look for the one I desire.  I feel it is near me.  I look and look and look, turning around several times to find it.  I sense it is close but I don’t see where it might be or who might have taken it from me.  I feel they are playing a hide and seek or bait and switch games with me.  It occurs to me to check my pockets.  I reach behind me and in my back pocket are the pastries of my desire in perfectly wrapped single servings portioned out for me.  The pastries have multiplied.  As I pull one out of my pocket there is another on it’s heels remaining in my pocket.  I pull one after another after another until four pastries are sitting on the counter.  There seems to be an endless supply within my back pocket.

~~~~~ DREAM ENDS.

When I did wake up i had a pain in my ankle just above my heel.   Since dreams always enjoy word play I point this out since the word also showed up in a physical sense.  I also thought it interesting that my friend Sasha who I hardly know was in the dream.  I wonder if that is close to Santa and if that is a play on words.  I put the reference here for future use.  I like the message of the dream because it is an indication to me that what I desire is already in my back pocket.  The highlight of my day is always my morning coffee and danish.

 

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After waking up in the morning and doing my usual bathroom break, I returned to bed for the precious snooze.  I immediately find myself in a restaurant.  We are seated at a long picnic style table which reminds me of the last supper because everyone is sitting on one side.  There is a male family member seated at the other end of the table who stands up.  His act of not conforming to what we are doing namely sitting to eat outrages me.  In a stern tone I tell him, “Sit your ass down!”  I am looking through the menu deciding what to order.  I decide to order empanadas but the waiter tells me the empanadas have to be picked up from a location in Columbia which would take me a day to travel there.  Curiously, I recall Columbia referenced in a previous dream but this doesn’t quite yet trigger a lucid state.  I decide to order pizza instead but cannot decide on the size of the pie.  The waiter shows me the square pizza boxes.  They are twice as deep as you would expect them to be.  He opens a 16 inch box which has a double decker wedding cake inside.  It reminds me of my new Shamanic drum which I just purchased.  He cuts the cake in gesture saying, “Your pizza fits inside.”

A waitress tells me the game played at the restaurant is Pig Latin.  Whatever you say you must substitute the p’s for d’s.  They seem to be very good at substituting the sound.  They do this effortless.  This frustrates me because there is always a new requirement.

I am given an envelope with seeds to occupy my time while I wait.  I walk outside so as to not be required to participate in the Pig Latin game. The envelope is getting wet as the day is cloudy, drizzly and grey.  The fibers in the envelope are breaking down exposing the seed to the moisture.  I worry the seeds will germinate before I am able to plant them in an appropriate place.  I begin walking looking for a place to plant them and discover I am in Paris.  Knowing I don’t have to be anywhere until tomorrow, I decide to take advantage of the situation and walk up the Champs-Élysées toward Rue de Rivoli and the Le Marais district.  I’ve been here before so I know my way around.  I will find an appropriate park to plant the seeds on my walk.

The sites are so beautiful I want to take a picture.  As in a dream from yesterday I don’t have a camera with me.  This awareness triggers a lucid state.  The walk is longer than I remember it to be so I sit down.  My seat then begins to move continuing in the direction of Le Marais.  Beneath my seat, I hear a pipe or muffler dragging on the ground behind me.  I smile with an inner knowing, this is just a sound effect let it drag I am not worried about it.   The chair is now moving at a good clip.  I turn and look back taking in the sites, “That muffler doesn’t seem to be impeding my progress.”

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I then find myself at work.  I feel I have a bone to pick with my co-workers.  I somewhat know I am in a dream cocky in my attitude and with mandate in hand.  I am determined to find what I am looking for.  I WANT THE TRUTH.  I want to know what has been hidden from me and why I have been made to struggle to find it.  I can see the people working in their respective office spaces.  Each has a role to play.  There is a science about it with precision and certainty.  I know my job here to be one in communications.  I study the setup I have in place.  I know it intimately for I am the one who set it up.  The overlords  have been using my equipment to their benefit and withholding information.  I want clarity.  I want transparency.  I see a woman in her cubicle who shares a wall with me.  She is not aware or possibly she is aware but hiding the fact that she knows I am overlooking.  She works to decipher the communication on the wire.  She inconspicuously looks through a post card that serves a dual purpose.  One of concealment and the other of insight.  Used in combination with her computer she is able to decipher the transmission on the wire.   λs I eavesdrop through the transparency of the post card she holds I clearly perceive the hidden strands.  They are not unlike the stands which brought me here when I entered the dream portal.

I know I must press forward.  I leave my cube and enter the main area of this section of the pod where I work.  There is a mobile mail station at a junction point.  Assuming if I work here I must have mail being addressed to me at this location.  I look at the many mail slots on the mobile station not knowing what name I work under.  I can’t seem to find my mail.  The λλale Carrier approaches from the right junction and looks at me.  With authority,  I ask him to hand me my male.   He then asks, “Who are you?”.  Taking a chance, I answer, Ruben Bailey.  I add a clarifying statement and disclose I often don’t pick up mail here so it may have been backlogged.  He then answers, “I’m not aware of any male.” but hands me several flyers which he is delivering to all employees.  I pause somewhat disappointed yet knowing any information received is the next clue and its more than what I had when I arrived.  I am empowered to change. Turning inward, I glance at the flyers and look around to see what is within my control to change.  The flyers indicate there is a ωelcome πeception today.  I move forward to excuse myself with the young λλale Carrier end enter the restricted space where the ωelcome Party is being held.  There are λliens here and I am aboard a space ship which has just landed.  I can clearly see out the windows of the çraft.  I move to a position where I see clearly.  The windows are full length floor to ceiling in 360 degrees all the way around around çraft.  There are so many λliens here who look very different from humans.  I am unafraid yet a bit overwhelmed by their numbers.  I reach beyond any fear and wave in their direction letting then know I have arrived.

Knowing my time is limited, I return to my duties to see what changes I can make to give me an edge with the overlords.  I know they need me for their business.  I also know they can’t do it without me.  They rely on me to harvest the fruit of my labor.  I sit and ponder how I might effect a paradigm shift to better harmonize with my desire and intent.  I play the scenarios to determine their possible outcomes and come to the decision to leave things as they are and take no action.

When i woke up I looked at my phone and noticed my niece had sent me a message.  It became the image of the dream.  It seemed fitting for this dream.

CEDELIA craft = 3- Self-expression, Joy of Living, Creativity, Perfection. Art, Inspiration, Enthusiasm, Perfection, Spiritual-Physical Connection, Communication and Triad Paradigm.
Positive Traits
On the positive side, the energy attributes of the number three resonates with love demonstration, creative imagination, fulfillment, encouragement, and talent. It’s also related to culture, innovative skills, wit, pleasure, freedom-seeking, adventure, free-form, brilliance, non-confrontational, natural rhythm, self-expression, enthusiasm, psychic ability, holy triad knowledge (heaven-human-earth, father-son-holy spirit, past-present-future, thought-word-action). The number three resonates with the energies of the Ascended Masters and their guidance. Three also resonates with expression both artistic (writing, painting, singing, sculpture, etc.) as well as feelings (love, affection, friendship, etc.)
Negative Traits
On the negative side, the number three resonates with indifference through superiority, lack of concentration or focus.

Secured at the Waters Edge

I am looking out my 2nd floor window at the playground below.  I can see lots of people gathered around the basketball courts.  I notice a man in black shorts coming in the building from the playground.   School is in session.  My teacher is getting ready to teach a class.  I can see him in the closet looking for his training materials.  He comes and sits beside and places his left arm around me.  Looking down at my feet I become aware that we are sitting at the edge of a well.  There are several rivers that feed the groundwater for the well.  The well is partially covered about 2/3 of the way and the remaining 1/3 has a chicken wire screen over it that prevents anyone from accidentally falling into the well.  I worry that my dog may someday fall into the well.

As the class begins we are taken on an adventure.  I lesson in survival.  We are placed in unknown territory and are tasked to find our way back.  The trick is you can’t come back alone.  You must return with your entire team.  We strategize.  I seem to be the main player holding the treasure.  The other players have to cover for me.  We have almost cleared every hurdle and are nearing our touch down return.

Jacobs Ladder

This is an old dream that i had maybe a year ago (2017).  It has been forever present with me.  It was more than just a dream or vision.  It felt very real that it has not moved from my consciousness.  I think about it all the time wanting to know more about it.  Since my recent dream where I discovered I can replay an old dream I thought I should write this one down.  A year ago I wasn’t journaling my dreams yet I still have them and the most powerful ones I do still remember.  This is one of them.

I wake up in the dream to find that I have been asleep for many many years. I have not aged but somehow it is now at least 25 years into the future.   I don’t know this until later in the dream.  I am witnessing the President of the United States who doesn’t say a whole lot throughout the dream but his presence is known.  It seems only some people are aware of me yet I am there among them.  The President has an entourage of people around him constantly.   I am observing all that is going on and I somehow I know the topics under discussion.  We are all sleeping in close quarters several assistants along with the Press Secretary are constantly attending to the Presidents needs.  The President is one of the one’s that is not aware of my presence or at least he has not acknowledged me directly.   In the future they’ve made drugs such that they are no longer harmful.  Even drugs that were once illegal now have versions that can be taken for pure pleasure with no harmful side affects.  They have eliminated the substance abuse problem.

The President needs a prescription and therefore his personal medic is called in to administer the drug.  A young man enters who is a member of the a naval academy.  He is studying to be a doctor and can already prescribe medicine.  He comes in and notices me but doesn’t say anything so I’m not sure he can actually see me or simply senses my presence.   As the conversation continues I get more and more signals that confirm he is aware of me.  It is as if I can hear his thoughts.  The sound of his voice is so beautiful to me.  His name is Jacob.  He is such a caring individual with a deep curiosity for life.  His desires are noble.  He tells me he wants to change the world from the inside out.  Although he is working for a Republican President he himself is not a Republican.  He has only claimed to be a Republican to effect change.  We seem to hit it off and begin playing on each other bantering back and forth.  The Press Secretary also is fully aware and loves the young man and respects his naivete.  His innocence is simply intoxicating.  He tells me he finds me very attractive.  Something else about life in this century is that sexual expression is more openly accepted as an exchange of energy.  It’s not uncommon for people to be intimate and rejoice in one another’s presense.  He again tells me he finds me very attractive.  I ask for clarification to which he tells me that I am exactly the type of person he has always dreamt about being with.  I ask him if he is gay to which he says that’s a thing of the past its more about being with the one you connect with and love.  Somehow he understands I’m not from this time period.  He then shows me how they are intimate with each other freely male and female without any hangups.  He then comes to me and begins to pleasure me.  The feeling of pleasure is overwhelming.  I tell him I don’t date guys in their 20’s.  He again emphasizes that he is in love with me as I AM EXACTLY what he has dreamt about.  With his touch I can feel exactly what he is referring to.  Knowing what he knows, I too now feel him and sense the connection.  I am falling in love with this young navy cadet.  He is paying me more attention than his responsibilities.  He tells me to wait for him.  While I wait he tells me to experience others as he has demonstrated.   The sense of pleasure is overwhelming.  I can hear a bit of scuttle between him and the President as he has neglected his duties in spending time with me.  He then assures me that he has everything under control.  I can still over hear the conversation but it sounds like he is loosing his patience with the President.  I tell him I don’t want him to risk his career.  He then asks me if I would love him regardless meaning if he didn’t have a career would I still love him to which I say of course. I now realize I’ve always wanted someone like him.  I tell him to fulfill his duties and come home to sleep with me and cuddle with me.  He is welcome to sleep with me anytime.  I’m starting to get tired as sleep falls upon me.  He is now in my bed cuddled with me late at night.  I can feel his body pressed against my body.  We dream of a time when we can be together forever.

When I woke up in the morning the presence of him was gone.  I felt like I had allowed myself to fall asleep and allowed him to slip away.  In my desire to recapture that moment I heard a voice say “You are him. You are the connection you seek.”

And Jacob went out from Beer-sheba, and went toward Haran. And he lighted upon the place, and tarried there all night, because the sun was set; and he took one of the stones of the place, and put it under his head, and lay down in that place to sleep. And he dreamed, and behold a ladder set up on the earth, and the top of it reached to heaven; and behold the angels of God ascending and descending on it. And, behold, the LORD stood beside him, and said: ‘I am the LORD, the God of Abraham thy father, and the God of Isaac. The land whereon thou liest, to thee will I give it, and to thy seed. And thy seed shall be as the dust of the earth, and thou shalt spread abroad to the west, and to the east, and to the north, and to the south. And in thee and in thy seed shall all the families of the earth be blessed. And, behold, I am with thee, and will keep thee whithersoever thou goest, and will bring thee back into this land; for I will not leave thee, until I have done that which I have spoken to thee of.’ And Jacob awaked out of his sleep, and he said: ‘Surely the LORD is in this place; and I knew it not.’ And he was afraid, and said: ‘How full of awe is this place! this is none other than the house of God, and this is the gate of heaven.’

— Genesis 28:10-17 Jewish Publication Society (1917)

Santa’s Paradox

Apr 04, 2018,

So last night I had a dream that I couldn’t remember yet here it is.  My alarm rang and I knew I had at least one snooze before I had to get up out of bed.  I also had to pee and I know you can’t fully enjoy a snooze while having to pee at the same time.  As I turned to lift the covers there beside my bed was a man, a green man.  I paused for a moment to look at his eyes and the green fur that covered his face.  His eye lashes gently opened and closed. As I rolled out of bed my knee hit his knee, I thought, “How could that be?”  Upon lifting my sheets there was a pillow beside my knee.  How clever for him to have placed  a prop.  So I ran along to the bathroom.  As I stood there I remembered vividly what I had been dreaming.  Repeating it over and over in my head so as to not forget.  With time constraints, I decide that would be the manner in which I would remember the dream.  I flushed and returned to bed where the green man still sat. I carefully slipped back into bed.  10 minutes later the alarm rang for a second time.  I looked over to find the green man had gone and with him the entire memory of the dream.

I thought it a great opportunity to start adding my book to my blog since I didn’t have a dream to journal.   Its a lot of work to keep up with my dreams so it is nice to have a day here and there to make them presentable.  My intention was to publish my book “In the Course of a Dream, Emmanuel for Love”  in its entirety on my blog to make it easy for me to search key words and simply to make it publicly available.  I had a little time before work so I turned on the TV for background noise and tuned to my favorite shows on Amazon.    I started watching an Amazon recommended program just for me, “New Energy Series, Free Energy – The Race to Zero Point”.  I remember there was a dream in my past where Zero Point had come up in the book back when I knew nothing about Zero Point.  Having the PDF of my book loaded and handy on my computer I searched for Zero Point and here is where the magic began to unfold.

Now I haven’t looked at my book in a long long time.  I also knew there was a purpose in my having written the book even if it was to merely guide my life.  I somehow know the book and dreams are a key part to fulfilling my mission.  So I took a moment to reacquaint myself with it.  I paused to take in the title page, the copywrite page and then the inscription which reads:

Spirituality is a treasure
to live for all humanity,
to overcome a notion,
in a time when spirits rejoice.

I then searched for the reference to Zero Point and was taken to:

A Visit with Santa Claus

I am in a Harry Potter stadium where I am trying to find my way back home.  I go flying and flying on my magic carpet, trying to find my resting place.  The people who live in this area travel on bicycles that fly through the air.  They simply fly.  I feel like I am on Crown Hill where I used to live as a kid.  I try to go back to my childhood house but the scenery and hillsides look different.  I am slightly disoriented.  I land my magic carpet on a hillside and walk along the front yard of a house, not knowing where I am or how to get home.  It is about four in the morning, and it is still dark outside.  The man of the house is standing near an arched trellis with his two dogs.  I tell him that I am lost and disoriented.  I ask him if he could please show me the way out and point me in the direction of my birthplace. 

He takes my hand under his arm and walks me under the archway and through a door.  He opens the door and walks me across the threshold to the other side and says, “There you are.” Looking around there is nothing but a dense fog and clouds. Fearing he might leave me here and close the door behind me, I grab tight onto his arm and ask him to please guide me and tell me in which direction I should head. With all the clouds here, I would never be able to find my way back home.  He then says, “You can go this way or you can go that way,” as he points in opposite directions. Unsatisfied with his answer, I cling to his arm.  He then says, “My son, no matter where you go, you pull the universe with you. You are home.” 

As he says those last three words, his face begins to transform before my eyes.  In his face is the face of every human being that has ever lived.  With that, I realize who this man is and I become lucid.  This is the Face of God.  Knowing I need to take in the fullness of this moment, I pause in thought to stare at the fullness with which he holds humanity in his countenance.  He now has the look of Santa Claus, with spongy curly white hair, a white beard and rosy red checks.  He is talking to me and I can see his lips move with his every word. 

I began to wake up, and as I awakened and my eyes began to open in real life, I could see this man standing at my bedside.  Now fully awake in the presence of Santa Claus, I could hear him saying something.  I quickly reached for my voice recorder so as not to miss any words that he might say.  I began to lose the signal, so I meditated as he patiently waited for me to ready my recorder and continue the dictation.  “Spirituality is a treasure to live for all humanity, to overcome a notion, to be heard in a time when spirits rejoice.”

He then began signaling me to come follow him.  I was not sure where he wanted me to go because he was standing in front of my closet door.  So I said, ”Okay, but first I’ve got to go to the bathroom, would you please wait here and I’ll be right back, then we can go wherever you would like me to walk with you.”

I got up out of bed and made a mental note of the time.  It was exactly 4:33 am on the digital clock in my bedroom.  I went to the bathroom to do my business and came back to bed where the grey-haired Santa Claus was still patiently waiting for my return.  I hopped back into bed with my voice recorder in hand ready to dictate whatever the old gentleman had to say.  He was telling me how to find my way home.  He said it didn’t really matter which direction you go, you pull the universe with you.  He then pulled out one of those birthday party whistles, the type that unravels when you blow air through it.  He said it has to do with “zero point” and the sound of the universe when you blow through the party whistle.  Each time he blew through the whistle the tube unraveled.  I could see a bright red light at the end of it.  From blowing his whistle, my bedroom began to fill with red light.  The red light emanated from the tip of the extended party whistle.

I gazed into it and saw a crystal lens much like the one I see when I meditate on my third eye.  He was basically telling me that he is the force that provides the propulsion energy flowing through the party whistle.

I think they were celebrating my arrival because he continued to blow through his party whistle over and over again.  Maybe they knew I was having a birthday party tonight.

His image slowly faded but in the red light that still filled my room I saw a vision of a little cartoon mole or chipmunk that had come to lead me down the road.  This creature was telling me to follow him.  At the end of the road, I could see a baby chick that had just hatched out of its egg.  In the sky was a bright orange sun and in the Heavens I could see a book whose pages were being blown by the wind.  The scene reminded me of the California Raisin commercials.  In the background, I could hear the words to that John Denver song, “Take Me Home, Country Roads.”

 

“Almost heaven, West Virginia,

Blue Ridge Mountains, Shenandoah River.

Life is old there, older than the trees,

Younger than the mountains, blowing like a breeze.

 

Country road, take me home

To the place I belong,

West Virginia, mountain momma,

Take me home, country road.[1]

 

I am in complete and utter awe, or should I say utter aum, when I read my own dreams. Aum is said to be the sound of the universe.  I believe I have seen the face of God and have held his arm and asked him to guide me home.  In writing my dream and vision this morning of the grey-haired man that reminded me of Santa Claus, it all resonated within me.  At some level I felt God and the Universe were celebrating my birthday with me. Curiously, when I was writing my dream this morning and got to the part that reminded me of the California Raisins, my phone rang once and stopped. I paused for a second to see if caller ID would tell me who was calling but it did not ring again. The phone rang just once and stopped.  It was not even long enough for caller ID to register.

I felt a wave of synchronicity flow though me and thought how peculiar.  I then remembered back to the dream where Jennifer (my angel) had given me a cell phone that had programmed in it her number. She had instructed me to use it anytime I needed her.  Was this an encoded message from the universe?

Have you ever told a person, “If you want me to pick up the phone, send me a signal by letting the phone ring once, then hang up and wait a second and then call back and I’ll know it’s you calling me?”

I resumed writing down my dream and as my pinky finger hit the final ‘a’ in the word California, the phone rang again.  I paused to look over at the caller ID.  Believe it or not it was an out-of-state call.  The display on the caller ID read, “California.”  A mere coincidence to some, but for me it was my confirmation, which the universe always provides to let me know that I am on the right track and can trust in the messages from spirit that I am receiving.  God is so incredibly wonderful.  I love God with all my heart, mind and soul.

~~~~

I found it eerily interesting that today all the chimes that are ringing in heaven with synchronicity drew me to this dream because this dream is the heart and soul of the book.  I didn’t remember it being that now but i did use this as the inscription for the book so it must say something about the importance of this dream.  I never really understood the words of the inscription I simply knew it was important and I’ll confess I still don’t know the importance except for a glimmer of something that came through today.

Second this last year has been all about Santa Clause.  This will need further explaining which I can’t do here.  Suffice to say the topic was so pressing on me that I bought a Santa suit around Thanksgiving.  I knew I had to dress up as Santa for some reason.  I procrastinated till the last minute to order everything because the good gay boy that I am it had to be flawless.  I ordered really nice boots, a genuine leather belt,  the whole works.  The boots arrived literally the day before Christmas.  More on Santa later.  So there is something else I must tell you which I’ve been keeping to myself.  I am in the process of having a baby.  This too is a long story that needs a lot of explaining.  Between my coming around to having the desire to have a baby and the Santa suits I could probably write a book.  It feels very important to me so I need to write about it so I can later remember the details.

Moving on….so I am at the stage of being matched with a surrogate.  I have an agent.  I have names picked out the fertilization has been done and things are presently on ice meaning I have one frozen embryo.  So yesterday I messaged my agent to ask for an update on the surrogate and she indicated that the surrogate she had in mind previously has not been responsive to her messages.  Major bummer but she did say that she had others who could possibly work but she needed more time.

Going back to the Green Man, I am waiting to  hear the chimes of synchronicity when I begin watching the the Zero Point program in the background when the man narrating starts talking about the baby’s arrival.  That immediately caught my ear.  He was referring to the advances in zero point energy as being in it’s infancy but he kept using the analogy almost so much as for me to feel he was talking to me.  Already we had the subject of Zero Point and the hidden importance of Santa Claus not to mention the inscription of the book and now the BABY!!.  Holy Moly I thought I must be going to get news about the surrogate.  I no sooner thought that when the alert popped up on my computer that I had a message from my agent.  She had someone for me.  She even included a few pictures of her and her family.  As I’m scrolling through the pictures the last picture was of the surrogate and her family she has 3 kids and her a very prominent GREEN MAN the Grinch.  It was a Christmas picture.  Here was a family dressed in Christmas colors sitting with the Grinch, yes a GreenMan.  I think the Grinch is probably the dad because he was not a fake Grinch he was real GreenMan.

OK … it doesn’t end there.  So I am reading her profile and one thing that concerned me about her is her age.  She is 41 or 42.  I’m thinking isn’t that too old to bear children.  So I quickly do a search online and come to this….

yada yada yada ….

So what about the notion of delaying childbirth until a maternal age of 45, 50 or older? 

From <http://www.sheknows.com/parenting/articles/5244/delaying-childbearing-how-old-is-too-old>

 

The one word in the inscription I had the most problem understanding is the use of the word notion.  What did he mean by that? Did I miss interpret him.  Well the answer now is no obviously.  I have been struggling with the notion that I am too old to be a father.  I am 54 at present.  Now I’m researching this as it relates to the surrogates age and not mine but it applied to me as well as the surrogate.  Maybe the inscription is for me to overcome the notion that I am too old to be a dad and in doing so knowing that God and God alone has picked the perfect surrogate for me.   My surrogate is Godsend.  Dreams are multidimensional and ring true on many levels.  They always have wordplay in them.  If you take the time to connect the dots something magical happens.  The other dimensions come alive as your awareness grows.  This is part of my mission to share my experience with dreams.  This is my truth.  This is how it happened.  I know it is magic in my life maybe you can find magic in your life.

Anyways I digress because yes i kid you not….there is more.  So case closed…guided by my dreams I know God is telling me I must over come this notion and get on board whole heatedly.  It also tells me that I should not fear or worry about her age.  I’m in God’s hands.  We are in God’s hands.  Ok so I’m on board with the surrogate so I set up a meeting to discuss her with my agent.  During the call she tells me a little more about her.  She’s been a surrogate before.  Then she tells me the name of the last surrogate baby she delivered.  The name is one of the two names I picked for my baby.  I can’t give you the name but I can tell you I chose a boy name and a girl name both names are a variation on each other ie the masculine and the feminine  version much like Robert and Roberta or Don and Donna.  Can’t spill the beans here with the name.  My jaw literally hit the floor.  This surrogate has created space for my baby’s name.

So on a side note….I was so heart broken when some of the embroyos died and didn’t make it to blastocyst.  I had no idea of the numbers game with fertility.  I was also very conflicted about choosing a boy or a girl if i had the choice say for example I had 3 eggs 2 boy and a girl do you choose the boy or the girl.  Would the one resent me in the heavens for not picking them.  If you read back at my mermaid dream when I received the first news of the eggs not progressing.  I believe the mermaid came to foretell me the outcome.  So that further sealed the deal with me.

One last tidbit…the man narrating the program his last name was Bearden.  As you may already be aware I am a bear within the gay community.  My DVR is labeled Bearden.

Oh one more thing….so Debbie Downer Grinch came in to refute my claims of God inspiration and so I looked up the probability of the occurrence of words in the English language.  For instance what would be the probability of the word notion appearing given a single occurrence?  What is the probability of seeing the word Santa in a reference?  Come to find out Google can tell you this information. Santa has a 0.002%, Notion is a 0.005% and Baby is 0.006% and Grinch is 0.0000006544 which is about the likelihood of ZERO POINT.

 

Today magic is all around me.  Spirit dwells among me and as for the Holy Moly Mole one must have a little fun with it I suppose.

[1]               “Take Me Home, Country Roads,” John Denver, Bill Danoff and Taffy Nivert 1971

 

Mystery Sock

So tonight the night following the Not My Shoes dream, i had a date which I don’t often have or at least not often enough in my opinion.  Anytime shoes appear in my dreams I equate them to the Soul since the souls are in your shoes and in this dream the soul or shoe was missing it’s mate.  So I thought it had to do with my desire to find a soul mate and my lack of success in the matter.  I’m pretty much at the point of giving up on a soul mate given the direction my life is headed in from this point forward.  And it seems that all the available shoes or soulmates are not of my liking.  So after the guy who is someone I’ve been on a date with before long time ago and who reminded me a lot of my ex Joe was leaving I found beside my desk on the cedar chest a sock the size appropriate to a baby.  It was just one sock.  I asked the guy if it was his sock to which he said it wasn’t.  I had been all over the room today cleaning and at no time did I see this sock.  It just strikes me as eerily coincidental that I would be abandoning my pursuit of a soulmate in favor of a baby’s sock. Just like in the dream the shoes I liked only had one shoe without a pair.  The sock also has no partner.  I’ve been scanning pictures and I had a framed picture of me when I was in elementary school.  I think the sock would have fit me and I found it right beside the picture.  So many coincidences.

The Sacred Heart

Paramahansa YoganandaLast night I had a dream where I am with Paramahansa Yogananda.  He wants to re-establish the original church according to prophesy.  We must go back in time to a world called Pakistan.  Without hesitation and fully devoted to my guru, I follow him.  In preparation for the trip back, I’m told that his heart must be transplanted into the body of another man. I witness the entire transplantation process.  As if through x-ray glasses, I can see his beating heart reconnecting with all the major organs and systems of the man’s body.  His heart is now in the body of a man I do not fully recognize.  If I had not been allowed to witness the process I might not have been able to believe it, yet I feel his presence.  I know it is him.  I am amazed that his essence moves with him through this other man. 

 

We now embark upon our journey to go back in time.  I’m a bit confused however.  So I ask him, Guru, is it not India where you’d like to go? He replies, “No, Pakistan is the seat of the original church, as told by prophesies.”  When we arrive I am in culture shock.  I feel estranged.  The civilization here is so primative.  You can’t even get a cup of coffee here.  The place is a region near the boarder of both worlds.  I feel so out of place.  I can’t adjust to this environment.  It is so foreign to me.  I want to go home.  

 

The ordeal seems unending and at times I wonder if I am not enslaved here in this foreign land.  At times, my faith in my Guru slips me because I don’t understand all that is in his plan.  I wonder if I will ever see the day when I will reconnect with my homeland.  I miss my home.  I want to go home but I know this mission is very important and for that I am willing to stay in this foreign land.  

 

Then the day finally comes.  I had almost come to the point when I had forgotten about my homeland.  The day has come to go home. 

 

Yogananda taught his students the need for direct experience of truth, as opposed to blind belief. He said that “The true basis of religion is not belief, but intuitive experience. Intuition is the soul’s power of knowing God. To know what religion is really all about, one must know God.”

Echoing traditional Hindu teachings, he taught that the entire universe is God’s cosmic motion picture, and that individuals are merely actors in the divine play who change roles through reincarnation. He taught that mankind’s deep suffering is rooted in identifying too closely with one’s current role, rather than with the movie’s director, or God.

He taught Kriya Yoga and other meditation practices to help people achieve that understanding, which he called self-realization:

Self-realization is the knowing in all parts of body, mind, and soul that you are now in possession of the kingdom of God; that you do not have to pray that it come to you; that God’s omnipresence is your omnipresence; and that all that you need to do is improve your knowing.

 

Christ Sacred Heart
The Sacred Heart is a religious devotion to Jesus’ physical heart as the representation of the divine love for humanity.  Christ, in his appearances to Margaret Mary, allegedly promised these blessings to those who practice devotion to his Sacred Heart. This tabular form of promises was not made by St. Margaret Mary or her contemporaries. It first appeared at 1863. In 1882, an American businessman spread the tabular form of the promises profusely throughout the world, the twelve promises appearing in 238 languages. In 1890, Cardinal Adolph Perraud deplored this circulation of the promises in the tabular form which were different from the words and even from the meaning of the expressions used by St. Margaret Mary, and wanted the promises to be published in the full, authentic texts as found in the writings of St. Margaret Mary.[9]

1. I will give them all the graces necessary for their state of life.

2. I will give peace in their families.

3. I will console them in all their troubles.

4. I will be their refuge in life and especially in death.

5. I will abundantly bless all their undertakings.

6. Sinners shall find in my Heart the source and infinite ocean of mercy.

7. Tepid souls shall become fervent.

8. Fervent souls shall rise speedily to great perfection.

9. I will bless those places wherein the image of My Sacred Heart shall be exposed and venerated.

10. I will give to priests the power to touch the most hardened hearts.

11. Persons who propagate this devotion shall have their names eternally written in my Heart.

12. In the excess of the mercy of my Heart, I promise you that my all powerful love will grant to all those who will receive Communion on the First Fridays, for nine consecutive months, the grace of final repentance: they will not die in my displeasure, nor without receiving the sacraments; and my Heart will be their secure refuge in that last hour.

The last promise has given rise to the pious Roman Catholic practice of making an effort to attend Mass and receive Communion on the first Friday of each month.

Great efficacy of converting people has been attached to the use of the image of the Sacred Heart.

“Even at the hour of death, incredulous, indifferent, hardened souls have been converted by simply showing them a picture of the Sacred Heart, which sufficed to restore these sinners to the life of hope and love, in a word, to touch the most hardened. It would, indeed, be a great misfortune to any apostolic man to neglect so powerful a means of conversion, and in proof of this I will mention a single fact which will need no comment. A religious of the Company of Jesus had been requested by the Blessed Margaret Mary to make a careful engraving of the Sacred Heart. Being often hindered by other occupations, there was much delay in preparing this plate. ‘ This good father,’ writes the saint, ‘is so much occupied by Mon- signor d’Autun in the conversion of heretics, that he has neither time nor leisure to give to the work so ardently desired by the Heart of our Divine Master. You cannot imagine, my much-loved mother, how greatly this delay afflicts and pains me. I must avow confidently to you my belief that it is the cause of his converting so few infidels in this town. I seem constantly to hear these words : ‘ That if this good father had acquitted himself at once of his promise to the Sacred Heart, Jesus would have changed and converted the hearts of these infidels, on account of the joy He would have felt at seeing Himself honoured in the picture He so much wishes for. As, however, he prefers other work, even though to the glory of God, to that of giving Him this satisfaction, He will harden the hearts of these infidels, and the labours of this mission will not be crowned with much fruit.’

 

The Jesus Man: A Gateway For Immigrants

Liberty Enlightening the WorldI had a dream where I hear someone say from behind me, “Maybe you should use easy off to clean the oven.”  I turn around to see where that off the wall comment came from.  There is a man entering the room.  He is a renegade.  He is wearing burlap over his face and hands because he lives and works in the sand.  He is a renegade sandman.  From his unusual comment and the burlap bag over his face, I believe him to be one of my alien visitors.  With this awareness, I become lucid in the dream.  I offer to shake his hand.  Somewhat apprehensive he slowly puts his hand out to meet mine.  I remain there motionless without withdrawing my arm waiting for him to make contact with my extended hand.  Finally he gains the courage and forthright to do so.  In this process I become 100% lucid.  I want to feel his hand even though he is still wearing the burlap over both hands.  He slowly grabs my hand.  I am utterly amazed at the physical sensation of the touch of his hand in mine.  I CAN FEEL HIS PHYSICAL TOUCH. Although I am experiencing this in a dream I know he is not a dream. It is different than the normal touch of a human hand.  His hand is very slender and his fingers long.

 

Finally he leans back and relaxes somewhat.  We begin to talk.  He is speaking to me in a language I know yet don’t recognize.  I struggle to determine if I am speaking orally or mentally within the dream. After a bit of idle conversation, I am certain we are communicating completely telepathically.  I can hear his words in my mind, I understand them as I do English yet I don’t recognize them as English.  I ask him what language he is speaking to me in.  Before he can answer, I ask if it is Spanish.  He laughs and replies, “No.”  I understand from his laugh that we are speaking a universal language born of telepathy.  It is a language of pure thought in the framework of one mind.

 

He begins telling me of his many struggles.  Before I realize it, he has taken off his burlap mask, jacket and burlap gloves.  He is now sitting before me barechested with just his pants.  He is a very good looking man who I find attractive.  He has scratches on his chest; minor wounds from the many battles he has fought.  In telling me about his struggles, I realize he is also describing the cause for which I am here.  I realize we share a common story, heritage and purpose.  He then tells me about a man who came down to New York to be born.  He refers to this man as the Jesus Man.  I know he is referring about me but I am confused as to his reference to New York. I live in Washington, DC but I am absolutely certain he is talking about me. I want to hear everything he is telling me so I don’t interrupt him to ask for clarification.  I am afraid he may withhold information if I give him the impression that I know who he is referring to.  He then starts telling me about my death; the death of the Jesus Man.  He then says that his mother died that following January. 

 

Bearing news of my mother a part of me wants to run and see my mother.  My consciousness splits and a part of me is now with my mother and another part of me is still sitting with him listening to him recount the events of the cause for which we are fighting.  Seeing my mother I want to tell her about her death but I realize I can’t share this information with her.  I simply tell her that I love her and I return to my conversation with the Sandman.

 

I am looking deep into the man’s eyes.  I can see them changing.  I can see symbols in his eyes.  Believing the dream is about to end, I wake up to grab my voice recorder but in the background I hear, “The shuttle craft is about to launch in 15 minutes.”  Oh my God, they are on their way but where are they going?  Should I be going with them?  With my voice recorder in hand, I decide to stick around for a few more minutes to see if I can get more information on what is happening now and where they are going.

 

Back in the dream, I can feel something on my back.  I reach behind me and pull a uniform that is attached to my back and I throw it down on the floor in front of me.  It lands in between both of us.  Laying on the ground it looks like a deflated person. He is still talking to me but his words are no longer registering.  I then hear over a loud speaker, “The shuttle is about to launch.”  Where are they going?  New York possibly? 

 

I immediately opened my eyes to record the details of the dream and quickly set the voice recorder down to return to the dream.  Upon my return, I saw a group of people standing under a sign that read Orothanos.  I somehow understood my house to be a gateway for incoming travelers into this dimension. 

 

Confused by parts of the dream I looked up the word Orothanos which I could not find anything similar to it.  In the dream, I had to sound it out because it was a word I had never seen before.  Each letter of the word was contains in a sphere.  The closest I could come to it was the word Oranos or Ouranos which means Uranus.

 

Uranus is the Latinized form of Ouranos, the Greek word for sky. In Greek mythology Uranus (often cited as Ouranos), Father Sky is personified as the son and husband of Gaia, Mother Earth (Hesiod, Theogony).

 

I also wanted to find out the symbolic meaning of New York. 

 

New York City, which is the largest city in the United States, is known for its history as a gateway for immigration to the United States and its status as a financial, cultural, transportation, and manufacturing center.

 

Liberty Enlightening the World (French: La liberté éclairant le monde), commonly known as the Statue of Liberty (French: Statue de la Liberté), was presented to the United States by the people of
France in 1886. It stands at Liberty Island as a welcome to all visitors, immigrants, and returning Americans.

Worldwide, the Statue of Liberty is one of the most recognizable icons of the United States, and, more generally, represents liberty and escape from oppression.

 

That is absolutely powerful.  WOW!!

 

Now at first pass I didn’t even stop to consider the meaning behind the word Jesus.  I assumed it was merely a reference to my strong spiritual convictions but then I decided to look it up.  Does the name Jesus have a meaning.

 

Jesus MosaicJesus of Nazareth also known as Jesus Christ, is the central figure of Christianity and is revered by most Christians as the incarnation of God. Muslims consider Jesus a prophet, and several other religions also consider him an important figure.

 

The name “Jesus” is an Anglicization of the Greek (Iēsous), itself a Hellenization of the Hebrew (Yehoshua) or Hebrew-Aramaic (Yeshua), meaning “YHWH rescues“. “Christ” is a title derived from the Greek (Christós), meaning the “Anointed One,” which corresponds to the Hebrew-derived “Messiah”.

 

So the meaning of the word Jesus is “YHWH rescues“.